You Don't Know Jack

Or Ammar. Or David. Or Lelia. Or Aqmad. Or Shema. Or that one name that I didn't quite catch because of that thick accent.

After one week here in Israel-Palestine - after a week of incredible, life-altering, paradigm smashing experiences - I am left feeling more hopelessly incompetent that I ever have before because I learned that just as soon as you think you know something, you realize: You Don't Know Jack! The world is infinitely more complex than I will ever be able to comprehend. To say that I have pinned it down is just arrogance. Nothing is EVER as simple as I could make it out to be.

For as long as I've known about the conflict, I have tried to avoid drawing conclusions. I don't like to make decisions in general, but I've always felt that I simply don't know enough about the conflict to ever give judgments of the "rightness" or "wrongness" of this or that side. I simply should not be allowed to ever make that call. However, as I started learning more, I began to subconsciously adopt the rather snobbish-intellectual perspective: Occupation is wrong, and those who suffer as the occupied people must always be right.

Now, let me be absolutely clear: I am certainly not going to turn my former opinions on their head. I have seen some of the evils of occupation firsthand. I have seen how it puts any sort of equal playing field out of the question, how it dismantles the economy, how it can keep people from living normal, self-determining lives. I cannot forget these things, and I do not think that they are right.

However, now I'm at an Israeli settlement. I am staying with an Orthodox Jewish family who is actually living on one of those supposedly illegal structures built on Palestinian land - one of those structures that I've probably lambasted in the past. And I've come to realize that just as soon as you think you know what you're talking about, you should probably shut up really quickly, because you absolutely do not know the whole story. Today, I've heard stories of people who want the same things that we all want: they want a place where they can practice their religion in safety, where they can teach their children good values, pass their traditions on to the next generation, have a place to call home and a community that they can share the triumphs and tragedies of life with others. Now who the heck am I to condemn anyone for pursuing these beautiful things?

I am not saying that I agree with every action taken by the Israeli government or even its citizens, and I'm not saying that there shouldn't be some concessions made for peace. What I am saying is that I was far too quick to point fingers previously. I don't know all the sides of the story or all these rich and wonderful personal narratives. I feel absolutely humbled by all the stories of fear and longing and desire that I've heard - I wish I had time to go into detail to them here. What I can say now with even more emphasis than I ever have in my life is that to every side of a conflict there is a story. Conflicts are comprised of people having individual struggles; to take the human out of the picture through demonization or stereotyping or simplifying is to absolutely miss the point.

I feel so blessed to have such a beautifully challenging experience. If only I had time to write more! Someone said today: You stay in a country a week, you could write a book. For a few months, you could write an article. For a few years, you wouldn't be able write anything at all. This is a little bit how I feel. I think that if I stayed here forever, I just would not even know what to think anymore. The more you continue to learn, the more you realize ... you don't know Jack.

Thanks for taking the time to read up on my experiences! I look forward to sharing more!